My mum – bless her – just couldn’t get the weather right. If it was raining and the farmers were rejoicing; she would instead wonder about all the shack dwellers who would be flooded out. “Do you know any of these people you are worried about, mum?” I would ask.

“Oh, there are probably millions of people who live in places where they are in danger of drowning or losing everything in this awful rain,” she said pointing outside to the gentle drizzle barely soaking up the dust.

“Where are these places mum?”

“Well, if you don’t know it just shows how you don’t care about anybody, but yourself.”

And then if the sun came out, she started worrying about the same farmers who were going to be ruined in the drought.

“What their poor workers are going to do when they have no work because the farmers lose everything – I cannot imagine? I wish it would rain…,” she said over her shoulder as she took the wet laundry, she had been unable to dry for days, outside. She was obviously a victim of the weather.

But most of us don’t see ourselves as being victims. Yet we are all victims of something, without being aware we are. And if you are a victim, you are likely to suffer from some form of depression. Because as a victim you believe the world is against you, therefore you are inclined to have feelings of low self-worth and guilt and have a reduced ability to enjoy life.

Are you a victim?

If you take stock of your life – it should come as no surprise to discover you are a victim. Most of us are. What will surprise you is how much of a victim you are.

There are some obvious victimisers. If you don’t have FU money, and struggle every month to make ends meet, you are a victim of your finances. And once you begin complaining about not being able to do things you could when you were younger, you are a victim of age.

You are a victim of circumstance, when you are always blaming everything except yourself for why you are in trouble, and your mantra is, ‘If only…’

If only it wasn’t raining, sunny, so hot, so cold, or if only I wasn’t so big, so small, short, tall, black, white, coloured, rich, poor, fat, thin, old, young or if only I had more of, less of… and on it goes…on and on and on.

Talking earlier about my mother, leads me to how many people are victims of their childhood. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve heard middle-aged people blaming all their shortcomings on their parents.

“My dad was a beaut. He always told us money didn’t grow on trees and if anyone was rich, they had obviously acquired their wealth dishonestly. That’s why I’m not surprised I’m virtually on the bones of my arse right now…my bloody dad drilled it into me making money was bad.”

Obviously the first step to correcting this is to stop being a victim. Of course there is some victimhood in all of us, but if you think about it, the obvious influences are easy to recognise and just as easy to deal with – if you just change your thinking. You stop blaming everything on everyone else and take some responsibility for your own life. By doing that, you will actively be dealing with any (potential) depression influences.